i used to think that i was better alone.
Scary All Over
Who saw you off?
Who packed your bags?
I wish that I
Could drop these stupid ideas from my head.
I want to know
Where is it you go?
I want to see
If the words that you spoke can exist in me.
I want things to hurt —
cigarette smoke to burn my lungs,
glass shards to cut my skin,
pavement to rasp against my knees.
I do not want beautiful;
I want a goddamn tragedy.
I’m trying to be more assured
But your nose is cold, like it’s made of snow
And I still miss you at times
Say that we’re afraid
Say that we’re wrong
Maybe that’s okay
If we’re not so strong, that’s the point of it
When I’m standing next to you, that’s the point of it
When there’s no one but us two, that’s the point of it
I think of the things that matter
I think of the things that don’t
Whatever it is, no matter
I hate feeling the way I feel
I hate feeling the way I feel today
And the song said let’s be happy
I was happy
It never made me happy before
Days are nothing but time on our hands weighing on me
But even when you’re gone I can see right through
You want disconnection, you want me there enough for two
Do you know how I dream?
I dream about you
Do you know how I feel?
The way that I feel when you laugh is like laughing
The way that I feel when you cry is so bad
Walking home after dark, past the softball park
Whenever you’re next to me
I haven’t the nerve to tell you anymore
Don’t you think we’ve suffered enough?
And we’ll forget about problems, if only for a little while
It was only five minutes, but it seemed like it stretched into days, and I’ll believe what I want to believe
Take me where it’s only us
Yo La Tengo - I’ll Be Around
11/17/13 - 3:00 am
stirring in this translucent cell,
shackled here by how hard we fell.
in these tender chains of flesh and feeling,
they are bleeding.